Newtie Had a Fit and Fell in It

 A friend of mine asked me yesterday why on earth I would watch the Republican Presidential debates.  He wondered if I felt my blood pressure was too low and needed elevating.

I agree it is a rather masochistic thing to subject myself to, especially since they seem to happen every other day of late.  I do it in order not to be  guilty of the thing I deplore in people on the opposite side of any issue – not listening.
  
And so it was last night, when I made sure to be tuned to CNN at 8 p.m., so as not to miss anything, given the kind of wild day on the stump the GOP had on Thursday.  Rick Perry suddenly discovered he was wasting his time.  Rick Santorum suddenly discovered he had actually won in Iowa.  And a woman once married to the man his mother charmingly referred to as “Newtie” decided to have a chat with ABC.

The elegant John King sat at the moderator’s podium and introduced the four remaining contenders for the Republican nomination for the 2012 Presidential election. 

And then he said this:

And just as speaker Gingrich surged into contention here in South Carolina, a direct fresh character attack on the Speaker.  
 

And Mr Speaker, I want to start with that this evening.  

As you know, your ex-wife gave an interview to ABC News and another interview with The Washington Post. And this story has now gone viral on the internet. In it, she says that you came to her in 1999, at a time when you were having an affair. She says you asked her, sir, to enter into an open marriage.

Would you like to take some time to respond to that?  
 

When Mitt Romney is presented with a question he would prefer not to answer,  his slick exterior stiffens and his tongue suddenly twists itself into speech-defying positions.  All that so-called “looking Presidential’ disappears and is replaced by bumbling.  Not so Speaker Newt.

Nobody can say “Fuck you!” more eloquently than Newt.Gingrich.  By the time he got through eviscerating John King and all the other “elite media” types who ever lived, somebody should probably have called the paramedics to attend to the news man, who tried desperately to look unfazed.

Oooooooowheeeeee!  One can only imagine what it would be like to cross His Speakership in a closed meeting where he is unencumbered by the invasive media cameras.  I pictured a meeting between Newtie and Iran's President  Mahmoud Ahmadinejad and saw the diminutive leader flying out of his shoes as the result of a Gingrich rant -- followed closely by the whine of missiles heading toward the U.S. coastline.
Can we change that slogan to "Anybody but Newt, please?"