Slow News Weekend?

The world's greatest golfer and his wife had a fight. Something about a tabloid story accusing him of hanging out with some cocktail waitress. The argument escalated because the wife wouldn't let it rest. She kept talking and talking; he kept hanging his head and saying nothing. Finally, his legendary temper took a hike and, then, so did he. He jumped in his Escalade and started the engine. His wife followed him into the garage and picked up a nine iron from one of the 30 golf bags lined up against the wall. She didn't want him to leave, so she started wailing on the back windows, so as not to injure his money-making apparatus. He squealed out of the garage and down the driveway in a rage and forgot about the fire hydrant at the bottom. He hit the hydrant at about 40 mph, lost control of the car and smashed into his neighbor's tree. His mouth hit the steering wheel on impact with the hydrant; the airbag didn't deploy until he hit the tree. End of story.

You have just read what I consider to be the most logical explanation for Tiger Woods' mishap with the tree. My question is What married couple on the planet hasn't had a couple of rough days and nights in their time together? And why does the media believe that it is any of our business? I'm just glad that the original reports of serious injury were apparently overstated and that Tiger will eventually return to his work.

I am grateful that we managed to get through the Thanksgiving weekend without a major world crisis. I understand that the cable news organizations have to fill the hours they spend on the air with something, but give me a break.