You Can Call Me BTFSPLK

Do you remember the old Al Capp comic strip, Li'l Abner? There was a pitiful character whose very presence in a frame guaranteed something very bad was about to happen.

Well, just call me Joe Btfsplk.

Ever since I reached adulthood, I have been in close contact with a disaster looking for a place to happen.

You think I exaggerate?



Milwaukee, 1968 or 69

It was our wedding anniversary. He surprised me with a fancy dinner at a swanky restaurant in suburban Milwaukee. It was lovely. As we stepped outside after dinner I felt as if I had fallen down Alice's rabbit hole. A car that had been parked in front of the restaurant door had been flipped over on its side. A trash can was perched atop the bench inside the bus stop enclosure, and the tree across the street had been uprooted. A tornado had touched down outside without even disturbing an ice cube in the restaurant.


Chicago, February 4, 1977, 5:25 p.m

An elevated train rear-ended another train on the northeast corner of the Loop at Wabash Avenue and Lake Street. The collision forced the first four cars of the rear train off the elevated tracks, killing eleven people and injuring more than 180 as the cars fell onto the street below.

I had driven through that exact intersection not more than five minutes earlier.

Google Images, no credit given

San Francisco, October 17, 1989, 5:05 p.m.

George Nikitin, Associated Press

For once in my life I had won a lottery for a chance to buy tickets for the All Bay Area World Series. My friend and I had taken a city bus from our office in downtown San Francsico to Candlestick Park. We found our seats in Section 153 first, then decided to get hot dogs and peanuts before the game started. The weather was strange, conditions San Franciscans referred to as earthquake weather. As we left our seats, I glanced around to take in the 50,000 plus fans who had already arrived. "Man, Kathy, this would be a terrible time for an earthquake," I said. Five minutes later, the Loma Prieta Earthquake took out the Oakland-San Francisco Bay Bridge, killed 63 people and injured 3,757. We hitched a ride back downtown on an NBC News motorcoach, which sustained four bullet holes as we drove through total darkness.

Oakland,1991

We lived in Moraga, CA, a small town just east of the Oakland hills. On October 20, 1991 the Oakland Firestorm swept through the East Bay, killed 25, injured 150 and destroyed 3,354 houses. The fire came within one mile of my home. I was forced to evacuate with only enough time to grab photo albums, one expensive painting and my medication.

Atlanta, March 13, 1993

I had been transferred by AT&T from San Francisco to Atlanta. The moving van with all my possessions, including my car, had driven off as I was driven away from my California home for the last time. When I arrived at S.F. International Airport the ticket lobby was mobbed. Since that was not at all unusual for that busy airport, I waited patiently in line to check in for my flight to my new home in Atlanta. The ticket agent asked where I was headed. "Atlanta," I chirped. "Not today, you're not," he smiled. "There's a blizzard in Atlanta." "Ha ha ha, that's funny," I said. It was true. The Storm of the Century, the Superstorm, The Great Blizzard of 1993 chose this day to delight the children of Atlanta with a school-closing snowfall. Two days in an airport hotel later, I arrived.

Hurricane Opal, October 4, 1995

A 100 year old oak tree fell between the back of my house and the neighbor's house behind me, taking out my huge vine-covered trellis and part of her roof.

1996 Summer Olympic Games, July 27

My employer, AT&T was the corporate sponsor of the Global Olympic Village for the athletes. I had just completed my 12-hour shift in the press relations office. After watching Shannon Miller and her teammates receive a gold medal, I left the park for home sometime after midnight. At 1:20 a.m. Eric Rudolph's bomb exploded on the exact spot that I had stood to watch the medal ceremony.

Simon Barnett/Getty Images Jul 27, 1996

March 14, 2008

The Atlanta Tornado hit downtown and this building less than one mile from my house.

Courtesy, NWS

September 21, 2009


The skies over Atlanta Metro opened and dumped torrents of rain after a drought of several years. Rivers and creeks rapidly overflowed, flooding entire communities up to their rooftops. This photo was taken in an underpass located just three blocks from my house.

                                            Photo by Caroline Smith

I REST MY CASE!