Penn State Matter Triggered Motherly Panic

 

I felt the unwelcome signs of impending panic.  It wasn’t rational.  It certainly wasn’t timely.  But there it was.

As often happens when I watch the news, I became emotionally involved as the details of the Penn State molestation scandal were slowly revealed.  Disgust.  Anger. Horror. Empathy. Questions. 

As I put the pieces together, I realized the victim in this matter was a ten-year-old boy, and the alleged perpetrator was a Penn State football coach.  That’s when the overwhelming, heart-stopping, breathe-impeding sense of utter fear swept over me.

My son, my only child, is 42 years old.  He was a professional athlete who began taking instruction from coaches at the tender age of 5.  As I sat there staring at the sportscasters debating the fate of veteran Penn State head coach Joe Paterno, I tried to count the number of men I had entrusted with the most precious part of my entire life. I stopped when I reached 25 and I had only gotten through his high school career.

Over the years I asked my son questions designed to produce answers that might alert me to inappropriate touching or time spent alone in suspicious places.  There were no alarms, no alerts.

Curious, I did a computer search of the local news station I watch here in Atlanta.  I found the following headlines:

^{BARTOW: Mayor accused of attempted child molestation}

DECATUR: CDC Deputy Director arrested on child molestation, bestiality charges

^{CANTON: Former sheriff's deputy arrested for child molestation}

^{SANDY SPRINGS: Preacher charged with child molestation}

All of these people, some men some women, are in positions of power we would teach our children to respect.  And these were only the local incidents reported within the past three months.

I couldn’t shake the panic I was feeling.  What if I had unknowingly exposed my son to one or more of the same kinds of people who were described in the news stories I found?  What if he had been to afraid or too ashamed to tell us?

I picked up the phone and called my son.  “I was lucky,”  he said.  “I only had good guys as coaches.  I can honestly and gratefully say no one has ever done anything out of line to me.”  

As parents, we can’t lock our children up and protect them from the dangers that exist outside their homes.  All we can do is teach them what is appropriate and what is not, make them feel they can tell us anything, stay vigilant for signs of trouble and keep them as safe as possible.  Child predators do not wear identifying badges.  They look like the local coach, the neighborhood cop, the minister that delivers the Sunday sermon, the scout leader and the next door neighbor.